Wheeee!

I'm back! Alive, leech free, blister free, and with some great, unforgettable memories from the oldest rain forest in the world (and yes, it is the oldest according to some research done by one of my companions) and the past few days.

Me beaming with pride for surviving the jungle!

I'll tell you now that this will be a MASSIVE post (which i'm sure you've already noticed since it took so long to load the page) since i have almost 10 days to summarize! i'll just take it day by day for you!

Sorry guys for not crediting the pics to the individual photographers, i have no idea who took what. All i know is the crappy ones are probably mine! -bk

Day 1/2 The true Tamen Negara Adventure!

Some cute kids on the bus we waved at.
They in return flipped us the bird.
So we showed them the shocker!

Livingstone the jungle man, asking for directions in Cameron Highlands.

And we were supposed to follow this guy?I think the map should be this way...

We arrived in Taman Negara at night (from Cameron Highlands) and went off to hire a guide for our planned 5 day jungle trek. Unfortunately, due to budget constraints, we quickly realized that our hopes for a long jungle trek would not be possible given our time limits and shallow wallets. So we decided that we would try to see the jungle on our own (guideless). Of course at the time it seemed like a good idea. Four days in the jungle, what could go wrong? Naturally we would soon find out. We decided to have a test run with a short, 1 day hike to close by attractions.

The first day trip comprised of a visit to the worlds longest canopy walk (like the one i did in Penang) and a visit to a bat cave. The Canopy walk was very disappointing due to the fact that 1/2 of it was closed (the better half it looked like, much higher than the section we did) for repairs. Of course this wouldn't have been a problem except that they never told us, wouldn't refund our tix or allow us to come back another day without paying again. Needless to say, we were quite annoyed but soldiered on back to our room to rest in the nice A/C'ed room which we weren't supposed to have (i figured out how to turn it on! I'm a hero!).

Looking down

steady, steady...

trudging along

Slow down guys! You always walk so fast!

What?!? Its closed? If you look closely at the pic,
you can almost see a tear of disappointment welling up in his left eye...

A few hours later we ventured out to the bat cave. The trail wasn't exactly marked very well (actually, it was but we couldn't read Malay and couldn't be bothered to bring an English map with us) but it was easy enough to walk. Anyways, we ended up taking a wrong turn and appeared in an Orang Asli village (the local tribe people in the rainforest). We were sure the old lady who spotted us had cast a spell on us or something but we ended up getting directions and headed back on our way.

Uh, i guess we want to see the Gua Telnga. Ah whatever, its the closest thing.

Finally made it! And that in the background is the entrance!

Our eventual arrival at the bat cave was quite a relief as it was beginning to get dark (well, not that dark, but i knew that it would probably be dark by the time we got back out of the cave). My fellow companions, a random assortment of single travellers who have all randomly met (i met one guy in Cambodia, the other two met each other in KL), were quite confident in our abilities to get out of the jungle as well as navigate the 4 day trek we would start tomorrow guide free. i on the other hand, the mature experienced one (just kidding) still held a little reservation regarding the multi day excursion. But i was quite confident that we would be fine since we found the bat cave and canopy walk on our own.

Squeezing through the bat cave!

Pushing along with someone we met in the cave

The bat cave itself was amazing, albeit quite scary. For one thing, there was lots of talk amongst us that bats carried rabies. Second, and more importantly, the cave was quite tight, dark, and from another person we met in the cave, housed 2 huge spiders! Now these spiders were not as big as the one in the butterfly farm. But the difference is that they were just sitting around, in cracks and behind rocks, not in a glass case! I've never explored a cave so carefully in my life. Every hand placement, crack and ceiling was carefully examined before another step was taken. And that went for all 5 of us.

This guy was hiding in a crack above our heads as we squeezed through.
He had something in his mouth. This guy was the biggie.

This guy was hiding on the other side of a rock,
just waiting for one of us to put our hand on him!

My compass is about 1.5 inches in diameter for your size reference viewing pleasure!

So, waddling around in bat poo, watching for spiders, and trying to keep from falling over on slippery rocks, we ventured deep into the cave for what was probably the coolest thing i did in the entire park.

My super green rented hiking boots
which i properly destroyed by the end of the hike.

Naturally, as darkness arrived we were even more nervous that the bats would suddenly swarm and all exit the cave at the same time. They did freak out once or twice but that was more our doing as someone would slip or they didn't enjoy us taking flash photos of them.

There's nothing to be afraid of in here!

Oh wait, what the hell is that!??

One miiiiillion bats!

Bats bats...

...everywhere!

Looking back up at the intrepid spelunkers!

Now as we exited the cave, the real adventure began. The sky was now dark (not completely though, not for another 40 min). Trudging back on what was supposed to be a very straightforward trail back to the dock, we got lost. Now, in the dark, with 3 flashlights for the 5 of us, walking up and down steep hills none of us could recognize, you could feel the tension start to rise. Within ear shot of local boats motoring by, we knew that it couldn't be that far away from the river where we started. But the density of the jungle forbid any off trail hiking without the use of a machete. We walked down a hill to the bottom where the trail just ended. Then we walked back up the hill in hopes of finding some sort of sign post. It was on the way back up i decide i'm just gonna let the young guys soldier it while i rest. I dunno if it was their enthusiasm or lack of experience but they quickly ventured out of earshot. The older guy and I decided we better chase them down before they go too far.

Getting back out of the cave, and no, not out the top, that's just me posing.

At this point i was thinking, screw it, lets just hack our way out of here and just go back to the room before we really get screwed. Thankfully, my laziness still overrode my panic reflex and when we caught up with the others i took my time heading back down the hill again. This time, following a rope, i looked very carefully for a hidden path, and you know what? There it was! Our trail had a large tree around it blocking our view this whole time!

Now, back on the trail back home, i breathed a huge sigh of relief. It was all on our minds, and someone finally said it, "Guys were well over our heads and we needed a guide for our multiday trek." Phew, thank god i didn't have to say that! But, looking on the bright side, most tour groups out there offer day trips which go to see a village, the bat cave, the canopy, and night trekking. We got to do all of those on our own, plus a little side adventure! hahah!

Moving on...

Day 3 Jungle trekking with Sean-a Paul (that Sean Paul said in the Jamaican accent!)

Waking up early on the first day of our hike, we organized ourselves, and arranged our guide. While he went out and got our food, we went out and got ourselves our last real meal for the next few days. i wolfed down a western breakfast with about 3 Roti Cani (they are so cheap and good here!) with my mates also busy gorging themselves on food.

After being fully satiated, we headed into our wooden boat and headed upstream to our entry point. Normally, i would have expected a peaceful river ride, but with the recent events fresh in mind, i figured it was best to stay at least a little on guard. It was a good thing too since the river had some rapids in it (class 2 only probably, when you're in a wooden boat that is leaking, those rapids look huge!). We all got wet but it was still quite thrilling. Nothing gets your heart pounding faster than cold river water and the fear that your boat is going to flip over.

Heading up river

i think someone didn't understand the whole burka thing

Some of us were just a little too relaxed

We arrived about 1 hr later at our entry point and disembarked for a cave that we would be staying in for the night. I had only a little idea of what to expect of the jungle. Most of the time i was right, other times, quite surprised. The density of the jungle is just like they say. You cannot see more than 20 m in any direction including upwards. It is really really hot in there and the jungle almost always impedes your progress. i was most surprised to see how fast the surrounding plants overgrow the path that was made. At some points even our guide got lost. How he knew he was lost i have no idea, but we made it fine to the cave neways so it wasn't an issue.Welcome to the Jungle! Livingstone looks a little to excited

The intrepid trekkers!

Poisonous snakes! Giant Millipedes!

Nope, didn't make it across, had to dry my shoes that night over the firePOOO!

Army ants, army ants, do whatever army ants do...

The most annoying thing about the jungle trek besides the leeches and heat, were the plants. Normal friendly plants back home like palms and ferns, were ruthless, spikey, tear at your clothing and skin, monsters! I wish i had a machete to hack them away but i did the good environmentalist thing and left them alone. Its better that way but sometimes its so frustrating when they stab you in the neck or face!

First blood!

We took a short pit stop at a overhanging rockface (which would have been perfect to climb). Not to eat though, just to have snacks, water and rest. i have to admit at that point i was exhausted. Completely and utterly exhausted! The people i'm hiking with are all 6 foot +. My guides are villagers from the jungle. They move so quickly through the forest i almost have to run to keep up with them! Up hills, down hills, across streams, through mud, it was sometimes impossible! Nevertheless, i made it there, and basically spent the next 15 min fighting off leeches.

Look at those sexy jungle men!

OMG, a LEECH!

DIE EVIL BLOOD SUCKING BASTARD!

After what seemed like too short a break, we continued on. Refreshed from drinking water and having a few cookies, i trudged on with the group. The second half of the trek was much easier as the hill were much gentler and the trek itself was much shorter. In total we treked 4.5 hrs that day.

We arrived at what was the largest cave i have ever seen to date (gonna head to a bigger one in borneo). An amazing, grand entrance with stalagmites overhead, we entered into a vast cavernous hole in the side of a rockface. I was totally blown away by the size.MassiveAbsolutely MASSIVE

The socks and shoes drying pit

Thats some wicked squatting there

There were some cool things that happened in the cave and at night. First, we decided to go out and collect firewood for the night (i wanted to dry my socks and shoes off). I had taken my shoes off and put on sandals (so much more comfortable than my rented shoes) so naturally i was very conscious of my footing (for leeches) when i was out foraging for wood. After an uneventful forage outside the cave, we turned to bring the wood inside. It was here that after picking up a pile of branches i felt something prick my had. I was like crap! I must have jabbed myself with a really sharp thorn! When i looked down at my hand i saw nothing there. Upon more careful inspection, i realized there was an ant on my finger and it was stinging and biting me! An ant! Could you believe that? It felt like a bee sting! Fortunately it only lasted about 20 min but after that incident, i was very careful where i put my hands.

After we got the fire going and had some instant noodles with chicken (thats pretty much what we ate every day), one of the guys told me to follow him to explore a section of the cave where he found some cool stuff. He told me around the corner the ground moved like it was alive. Of course, curious as hell, i followed him. And you know what? The ground WAS literally alive! The dirt was covered in little insects running about (they looked like ants) and some strange looking crickets hanging out. but that wasn't the best part. The most interesting thing happend when you stepped into the dirt. After stepping off, the ground would seem to bubble. We eventually found out it was a larger beetle digging about (probably to get away from us) but the illusion created really looked like the dirt was bubbling. The vid i have posted is very dim but hopefully you can see the action.

Another funny thing (pure coincidence probably) while climing this hill of living dirt was that the higher you got, the higher up the food chain you traveled. The bugs became bigger and less frequent, spiders became apparent, and then we saw 2 frogs. Of course our hypothesis of going up leads to up the food chain was quickly torpedoed out of the water when we found a snake skin at the base of the hill we were climbing. But it was still funny to think it (how convientient that would have made things!).

That night, lying on the ground of the cave i my sleeping bag, staring at the ceiling, i could finally absorb the cavernous size of this cave in which i was sleeping. Later in the night, the guides threw a log or two onto the fire, illuminating the cave in an eerie, firey glow. A spectacular sight.

Day 4 The Jungle Hide

Bright and early at 9 AM we woke up, ate quickly, took our photographs, packed and left. That day would be a nice short hike (2 hrs) which ended right before the rain started, at a lovely hide contructed to place our sleeping accomodations at treetop level. The hide had a window that overlooked a small river which contained a salt lick to attracted animals. To our amazement, a tapir came to drink water at the river even though we neglected to remain silent in the hide. With shutters snapping in a furious rage to capture this amazing moment, our intrepid photographers decided they wanted to get closer to the animal. Unfortunately, the tapir wanted none of this and as they apporached the creature, it turned and walked off. Not a rare sighting, but a sighting nonethelsss which made us quite happy.

Continuing the trek

Stopping to gasp at the local tree formations! 'How delightfully shaped this root is' Livingstone was saying

We sat there the rest of the day chatting and laughing about the stupid things that make us all different (we were composed of 1 Canadian, 1 American, 1 Dutch, and 1 Swede) and the same. As night fell, so did the rain. As i drifted off to sleep, it was pounding down so hard on our metal roof that it just sounded like a single sustained note from a loudspeaker. I guess that was the best time for me to sleep since it was easy to block out a constant noise as background.

Silly tapiar. Don't you know, the red rider is much more interesting?

Ok fine, maybe notThat T-shirt tan looks really bad in this pic. I'm pretty sure it doesn't look that bad. Pretty sure.

Peering out on the animals

Found him inside the hide

The beginning of the red rider, look at the madness in Livingstone's eyes!

Formed from the parts of lesser riders to create...

...the one, the only, Red Rider!

Day 5 The Village people

C'mon, i couldn't resist putting this pic up.

We woke up to the sound of our guide's voice telling us we had to get up to catch a boat. At least thats what we thought he was saying. Often times he would just say 'yes' when we asked him a question. And we would accept it fully knowing that he had no idea what were saying. But to be fair, he often asked us question which we did not understand and we often replied 'OK'. But, amazingly, everything always worked out in the end. We jumped onto a boat after a hour hike and headed back down the river to his village (amazingly it was the village that we went to the day we saw the bat cave, and our guide was the person we asked for directions as well!). He led us to our lodgings, a simple hut, wiht a plam leaf roof and bamboo floor.Time for repairs. Stupid sandals! I paid good Bhat for them!

Our home

Damn, why does this knobhead have to sit on my bed? Mmmmm, Milo powder and bread. The cornerstone of every healthy jungle breakfast!

I opted for something with a little more protein

I, being the slow one, ended up being shafted. Everyone else took the good spots, which was not really a problem for me. But what ended up happening was that everytime they went to their places, they would have to cross mine. If that wasn't bad enough, those heavy bastards kept breaking the floor beneathe them! At first it was funny, but that night, it became hilarious to all of them except for me. I was bascially sleeping on holes all night! Probably one of the worst nights i've ever had! but it was all in good fun so i didn't really mind.

See that piece of wood sticking up? directly underneath is a damn hole you bastards! hahahhaa

Hilarity ensued that night when we soon discovered that the roof was filled with spiders. I thought it was absolutely hilarious when 2 of my mates decided that they would sleep the other way to avoid the spiders. i kept telling them it didn't matter, they were everywhere! But it didn't matter to them. I guesss it was just piece of mind. i actually resorted to burning the spiders out with my lighter. We joked that since we already destroyed the floor, we might as well just burn the hut down. We could just imagine the look on our guide's face if we set the hut on fire. He would ask us what happened? We would reply that we were afraid of spiders so we burned the hut down. I think his only reply would have been stupid foreigners. Hahaha!

During the day we played around with the village kids. Playing with the toy cars, making chicken noises, etc. Anything to make them laugh. They actually taught us some words in their dialect. And for some reason, the first word they taught us was penis! At firsts when i joined them i didn't believe them ( i was reading in the hut). They had all these drawings in the dirt that resembled a penis (drawn by the kids of course). But i was sure it was something else. So the Swede decided he would settle the argument once and for all. He drew a stick man on the ground and pointed at it and repeated the word the kids had taught us. One of the little boys jumped up, and without hesitation, drew a penis on the stickman. I wish i had my camera for that moment to take a video. it was so hilarious/ridiculous that all of us, including the kids, couldn't stop laughing for 5 min. Those kids were good fun, but i must say, i'm not as good with them as my mates were. They had no trouble interacting with them and just have fun. i just stood around most of the time taking photos and vids.Giving us dirty looks when we first arrived.Breaking the ice by pretending to be a chicken!Playing with their toy cars

Poser!Kids love it when you take their pic and show them!

Teaching them how to make farting noises

They drew this, i really tried hard to believe it wasn't a dick

but it was. Hahahaa

There were a couple of demos from the villagers during the day. This included fire starting (in a very unique way i might add) and blow darting (harder than it looks). The blow darts were really fun as we tried to hit a target about 5-7 m away. But the fire starting was the most hilarious. We were allowed to try and we basically broke all their equipment. I guess we're just too strong. Hahah.Letting the pros demo for us. Took them like 30 sec to start a fire. Amazing.

Me having a go at it......But not really getting anywhere!

Livingstone didn't really do that much better either.Blow pipe demoRight on the second shot!
And we thought they were worshiping Tweety when we got there!Our turn

This thing is like one super long knob!Where am i supposed to point this thing?

yeah, none of us could hit tweety, but we were close. All except Livingstone.
He barely got the dart out of the gun. More practice needed!

That night, we gave Sean-a Paul a pullout poster from a Maxim magazine. Even though he was married and has a daughter (he's 21, his wife 16, his daughter 1) we thought we would leave him a nice parting gift. And of course we gave it to him while his wife was not around. Good times were had in that village.

Day 6-7 You know you stink when...

You know you've made it to Kuala Lumpur when...

Petronas baby!

... you can smell other people being clean (brilliant Adrian)! hey, what do you expect? We've been in the jungle for 4 days? Sweating, dirty, and most of all, tired from our ordeal, we boarded a bus bound for KL, and civilization. 4 hours later we entered KL. Of course, thinking that our bus would drop us off at a different place, we decided to stay on instead of walk and ended up going on a nice 80 min round trip to a nearby city before actually getting into KL.

Finally, when we arrived, smelly, stinking and filthy, we checked into our hostel, showered, changed, and settled in. Then it was off to reward ourselves with a nice, good meal. We had all hoped for a lovely pizza buffet somewhere but we settled on going to Pizza Hut (which was very good i might add!).

Amazing towers

Haven't done much here in KL since arriving. Walked around the city a bit which is very nice itself. Great chinese food! Done some shopping as well. i really wanted to buy a wide angle lense for about 100 USD, which fortunately i did not since i found it at amazon.com for 15 USD last night. What a rip off! We also watched a movie (Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street) which from the beginning i was very disappointed with. It was a musical! No really, its a musical and i just cannot stand musicals. Although a very bloody but funny film, it just wasn't to my liking. They literally sang the entire thing. I'd say there was no more than 10% talking, with 90% song amd sometimes even dance! Damn it was stupid!

The KLCC tower, so lame its not even worth writing about!

At night, my Dutch friend and I decided we would go take a look at the Petronas towers. A pair of iconic Kuala Lumpur towers and loom over the horizion in a manner that almost defines the city. The towers themselves did not disappoint in any way as they are amazingly photogenic and difficult to make look bad from any angle.

Day 8 X is for eXtreme!

Just outside KL is a famed world's largest waterpark or something. With nothing really better to do we decided to head out and try some surfing! Yeah, that's right, surfing. The wave pool there had big enough waves to try surfing! We arrived 10 min prior to opening in what appeared to be a very swanky neighborhood. High end shops and nice hotel, all centered around this water/amusement park. Our first of many disappointments of the day was that surfing and body boarding was only during the weekends for a grand total of 45 min each per day. Suffice to say, it was Monday and there was no surfing to be done. i was eXtremely disappointed but we decided to go in neways and try out the rides. Captain Quacker flashing i don't know what. But to be fair, he only had 4 fingers.
Poor Captain Quacker, he will never really know the true happiness the shocker can bring

I wanted to goto this park primarily to play in the water with some big waves and i knew that the rides themeslves would be pathetic. And of course they were in every way that i expected. Either way we went on a few lame roller coasters and other misc crap assed rides.

Looking a little too excited to me. Maybe they really did enjoy this ride?I dunno how he fit into this ride! This guy is 6'6"!eXtremely lame! But what the hell, i finally got to ride an ATV!!!This theme park was very anti-PC in so many ways.

1...2...3...BUKKAKE!!!

The park was so lame that they even closed the lagoon off so only the staff could surf. So basically all the water there was to play in was a stupid little fake beach section. We had also gotten passes the the eXtreme park which was anything but. The ATV ride was just on a short paved path which we did two loops around (super lame). They had a small climbing wall, which was actually just bouldering (V4 and up) which no one could do. And finally, they had a paintball section which comprised of targets and 5 shots per person. Like i said, X is for eXtremely lame!

The one saving grace of the park however was the ejection seat! Finally, i had the chance to ride this famed attraction! Not nearly as intense as a bungee jump, or even the drop zone maybe, it was still wicked cool fun. Being strapped down in a steel cage, listening to motors preload what looked like 50 massive springs and listening to the dude count down really set the scene and built the anticipation. Then POW! Being launched skyward at 5 g's, reaching 120 kph faster than an F1 car (according to the advertisement) and flipping over and over, it all ended too fast. But wait, we got to go again! 2 ejections for a grand total of 10 USD, including a DVD (with sound!), certificate, and most importantly, a discount card to other attractions (bungee in Bali, hmmmmm....). So worth it. Will i need to do it again, what the hell, why not, but if there are other rides available, i would probably skip this one. Get ready for the launch...

3...2...1...Wheeeeeeee! Stay tuned for vid!
Well, that is if i'm not too lazy to put it up!

So that about sums up the last few days people.

-bk